Marilyn & Sam: A Tribute Album

Marilyn and I have been friends since them awkward days down to the PHS running Cross Country together. At first all I thought was she was this girl with the name of a grandma who wore those coffee-talk style glasses where the stems (what goes behind your ears) connected to the MIDDLE/BOTTOM of her lenses (I can't remember, exactly)

But then I realized she was really cool! She was really funny and we spent a lot of time together in high school hanging out.

I've always marveled at the surprising similarities and extreme differences between us. Like, both of our dads are disabled in some way (her with the effects of polio, mine with what he just can't see) but my dad is a mechanic while her dad is a physics professor. She's the only girl in her family and her brothers were nice to her, while I've got loads of sisters and only remember the brutal torture I endured at the hands of my brothers.

She's the greatest girl - awesome cook, accomplished and gifted writer, Hinckley Scholar, concert pianist, book worm, natural birth wonder, devout runner, and really fun. Mostly, I'm just happy that we share a friendship. Happy that we exchange emails full of with sarcasm, nerdy quips, and general communion and understanding of each other. I feel grateful to be able to enjoy her awesome personality and to mooch off her good baking.

I have low expectations for friendships. It's a stupid marvel to me when I realize that someone enjoyed my company. But I feel lucky to have Marilyn for a friend. I look up to her a lot. And whenever I've felt I've helped her in some way or whenever we've had a great time together, it has brought me unmeasured satisfaction and feelings of self-worth. (I have self-esteem issues in being "friends" with people, feeling like I never quite learned how to do it) Still to this day, I'll find myself saying in my mind "Why is she friends with ME?"

When she married Sam I was a little disappointed. Not because Sam was sub-par in any way, but because it meant I'd have to give up my dreams of being able to say that my good friend Marilyn was a Rhodes Scholar studying at Oxford. (Here's a picture of the Radcliffe Camera, Oxford. Marilyn and I did a research paper on the dude who did something to make this camera come to be - ah, my memory serves me so well! Poor Marilyn! I don't know how she endured my 3rd grade reading and writing skills, or how she could belly up to the sub-100% we got on the paper! Sorry!)But, I'm mostly over that now. Luckily, Sam is as cool as Marilyn. He encourages Marilyn's quirks in their activities together, and they're super-fun to hang out with. What I guess I never appreciated about Sam was that he's an artist. Like, a real artist. I don't know what I THOUGHT he was before, but I wasn't expecting this quality!

I've been working on this little Christmas painting for about three months now and I HONESTLY started thinking there wasn't much to this art stuff. Then I woke up to Sam's art. He's works for Disney developing concept art for video games or something arty/techy like that. (you lika my jargon-speak?) When I started going through his blog, it BLEW ME AWAY! Wow, Sam! You are absolutely amazing! Let's highlight some of your posts here:

(This is a painting of their new baby, Malachi)

Sweet, huh? So, pretty much their a power couple in several ways (art ways, music ways, English-writing ways, baking ways, etc.). I didn't know Sam was as talented as Marilyn (albeit in different ways), I just knew I liked them together. Now ya'll know it, too.

The best was, the last time we hung out with them, afterwards Joel was talking to me about how impressive they each, and together, are, and he said, "It makes me think, 'Why are they friends with US?'"

No kidding.

Compassion-Less Service Leader

Foremost in my mind today is what I did this morning for "service" and the problems I've always had with rendering "service."
Here's the schpeal: I'm generally selfish, judgmental and lacking in compassion. It's just part of my personality. I feel a little justified because it's a common personality thread among my siblings and I. Occasionally, I'll have this charitable buzz about me where I'm excited to lend an ear, hand, or plate of brownies to someone. This is usually ONLY when I really like the person.
My compassion-less attitude wouldn't be such a terrible thing, except that I'm the Compassionate Service Leader in the ward. Theoretically I lead/support/provide opportunities for the ward to render only the compassion-est of service. I often joke that I have the calling not because I'm compassionate, but because that's what I need to LEARN about.
But seriously, and here's where I could use your advice: I can count off several experiences since being a Leader where I gave of my time, talents, money or food when internally I was really ticked off about it.
Sometimes I feel mad/frustrated because I think the person is using the ward undeservedly. I have internal anxiety about these instances because I know I should love the other person, that I'M the one that has the problem of selfish pride, whatever their motivations are. I mean, Pres. Monson said the greatest joy can only be achieved through serving others (not a direct quote).
This morning I signed up to "help" somebody at their house for a couple of hours. I don't know if the lady didn't really want the help and we all just didn't know it, but it was rough. In the end my overbearing, opinionated self offended her sensibilities and I got yelled at a couple of times (really) and her house is in basically the same state as it was before, despite 6 volunteers and hours of time spent there.
I came home crying afterwards because I'm so hormonal and because I'm upset by my uncompassionate-ness. My frustrations just kept mounting as we were "working" all while nothing was getting done.
Why couldn't I just love the person? Why do I have to be such a jerk in my head about these situations? I know there's something I need to learn from this. I've had several of these experiences, so I know there's a lesson I need to learn.
I'm NOT looking for ya'll to comment how compassionate I am. Just because I'm nice to people who are cute, funny, engaging, well-dressed, admirable and/or clever doesn't make me compassionate.
I'm not looking for patronage. I'm looking for advice. What am I supposed to learn? How can I overcome this ugly beast in my psyche? I don't want to be a jerk (in my head and otherwise) anymore!

What d’you name your baby Chance for?

You know what I forgot to include in my post about baby names? A story from when I was pregnant with Asher.
I was down to the Family Dollar with my then-only child Lincoln in the cart. In walks a woman that I guessed was in some way not “normal” with her care-taker. She walked over to me, and in the highest, most cartoonish voice said, “What d’you name your baby Chance for?!” I said, smiling, “His name is Lincoln.” Again she said, “What kind of a name is Chance? What d’you name your baby Chance for?” Her caretaker said then said to her, “Her baby isn’t named Chance. YOUR grandbaby is named Chance.” It was really awesome. To this day, that phrase rings through my brain at least once a month, whether I hear somebody say the name Chance or whatever. “What d’you name you baby Chance for?”

Cool, huh?

Happy Valentine's Day!

Love is In the Air!

I wish I had digital files of pictures from when we were dating. It would make this post much more entertaining. Anyway, here's a little more than you ever wanted to know about Joel's and my courtship:

1. Where did you meet?

Who knows? We went to the same elementary, junior high and high school. He was a snobby A-tracker and I was a regular, salt-of-the-earth, blue-collar C-tracker. Needless to say, our paths didn’t readily cross. The first time we noticed each other was in our senior year of high school on Halloween night 1996, at the seminary council party at Warren Robison’s house.

2. What was the first thought that went through your head when you met?

I thought he was really cute.

3. Do you remember what he was wearing?

He was dressed as Indiana Jones. We lovingly refer to him as IJLC, which is his favorite movie (Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade) – for many years this movie contained the only lines he could quote from a movie and the only actors he knew by name (Harrison Ford and Sean Connery). Thanks to Nacho Libre, his pop culture knowledge has nearly doubled in the last two years. It is the Beyst.

4. Where was the first time you kissed this person?

After a double date with Ammon and my friend Amy, we dropped Amy off at her house. Ammon and Joel drove me home to my sister’s house and Ammon waited in Grandpa Rass’s Lincoln for an HOUR while Joel and I had a heart-to-heart that finally ended in a kiss. (Honestly, we owe just about everything to Ammon for helping to get us together, to keep us together after Joel's mission, and to prod us toward marriage)

5. How did he/she ask you out?

He called me on the phone.

6. Where did you go for your first date?
We went to the dollar movies and watched ‘That Thing You Do’ with a bunch of his friends. I remember thinking that even though he was in the seat next to me, he was absolutely as far away from me as he could possibly be without sitting in the laps of the people on the other side of him…he was a little shy.

7.How long did you know this person before you became a couple?

We met in October 1996, but didn’t become a couple until May 1997.

8. Has this person ever proposed to you?

We done it. On May 24, 2000 down to the Provo Temple after we’d gotten in our first fight.

9. Do you and this person have kids together?

We have too many for me to adequately cope with, honestly. Each time I get pregnant I think I was so STUPID to think I could handle it!

10. Have you ever broken the law with this person?
Never. However, I have broken the law several times without him.

11. When was the first time you realized that you liked this person?

The first day I met him.

12. Do you get along with any of the ex's of your partner?
Ha ha! He has NO ex’s. Bless him. I married the most honest, innocent, moral person that has ever lived. Now you can feel sorry for him that he married me!

13. What’s the most expensive thing this person has given you?

You might think it would be my wedding ring, but it’s actually my digital camera.

14. What is one thing he/she does that gets on your nerves?

He doesn’t usually clean up after himself if he makes food for himself and the kids.

15. What is the thing you do that gets on his/her nerves?

I’m so high strung. He tires of my impatience.

16. Where do you see each other in 15 years from now?
If I haven’t gone on a real vacation alone with him by then (something that includes an airplane, the hot sun and a swimming pool for us to relax by) it will probably be because my kids have pushed me over the edge and I’ve been committed to the state mental hospital…clue in on that, Joel.

So, you know how when you read about the pure love of Christ in the scriptures and it says you have to be long-suffering, patient, kind, doing good to all men, etc. That’s Joel. He puts up with so much in me. When I’m pregnant, I cry everyday. I’m always exhausted and hormonal, and Joel gets the brunt of it, usually, right before bed. But he loves me, anyway, and has really helped me overcome a lot of my ‘issues’ in the last 7 ½ years. He’s the perfect match for me and just about everyday I can’t believe how well we get along together, how much peace is in our home, and how good looking he still is. Plus, he just emailed me and asked me if I would join him in his quarters this night for a toast (of sparkling cider, that is). I'm pretty sure I'm going to, even if it makes me look like a floosy.

What Will We Name the Baby?

So I honestly haven't given much thought as to what to name the baby what I'm carrying. Like some people I know, I don't really like to talk to people about what I'm going to name the baby because

1. I change my mind about it at least once a month and

2. I get sick of seeing people's disappointment in my choices.

With every kid I have heard the reasons why I SHOULDN'T name the baby whatever I've chosen.

Lincoln - "They'll call him Stinkin' Lincoln." - They/we do...honestly, sometimes he DOES stink, so...

Asher - "It sounds too much like Ashley." - But, I like the name Ashley.

"Kids might call him Asser." - They do/have. Our cousin, Taylor, who really is the sweetest, nicest kid, has had a bit of a speech problem in the past, i.e. car door was pronounced by him coy doy, etc. A year ago when he was visiting during Christmastime Joel came home from playing games with his family with the most incredulous look on his face. "Asher told me that Taylor called him Asso!" I just looked at Joel and said, "Joel, Taylor can't say Asher's name! He was just saying Asher's name." Joel: "Oh." The next day Taylor was sitting on a stool at his grandma's house and in the sweetest way patted the stool next to him and said, "Hey, Assy, come sit by me."

Clara - "Isn't that the name of a cow? Clarabelle?" - Yeah, a cow from a Disney cartoon that no one has seen since 1986.

For this baby several name incarnations have already been shot down. Ginger sounded too much like a stripper (okay, I'm the one that decided that). Lola was the same. And "Fiona will remind everyone of Shrek."

I mean, I get it, okay? When my friend Marilyn named her baby Sebastian I was like, "But, that's the name of the crab from the Little Mermaid!" Yeah, EVERY name is going to conjure SOME bad connotation for SOMEBODY! As a Special Ed teacher I have my own list of names that remind me of the "special" kids I used to teach and the "special" reasons why I could never name MY kids the like.

There's Rayden who would shout out to me in the hallways, in class, wherever I saw him, "5 star boxes, teacher!? 5 star boxes!?" Yes, Rayden, you can color in 5 star boxes.

There's Kayden who, although he couldn't read more than three words anticipated the Wheel of Fortune Extravaganza in my class and said, "What's that say, teacher? The Wheel of Fortune Estrasasanda?" (That's where the name of this blog comes from)

There's Michael, an autistic boy who perseverated on clocks, who surprised me one day by opening the elastic waistband on his pants, reached down into his big boys, pulled out his wristwatch, slid it onto his wrist, and licked the face of the watch.

And there's Paige, who incessantly pooed her pants in first grade and would CONSTANTLY yell "Boo!" to me while making starburst motions with her hands as I was trying to teach.

Okay, actually I am forever endeared to my special ed kids and I miss teaching SO MUCH! So, I guess those names aren't out of the running, per se.

I am just as opinionated as the next person about baby names. I don't want any name that's too popular. Joel keeps saying he wants to name it Emily, but I refuse simply based on the fact that it's at the top of the baby name lists these days.

Also, I don't like odd ways of spelling names. Why do we have to spell Makayla 12 different ways? My friend Elicia has a devil of a time with her name. She told me someone once called her El-lick-ia. Her maiden name is Timpson, and she also said someone once called her Elicit Tampon. That one's my favorite. I keep thinking about someone really saying it assuming it really was her name and it makes me laugh every time. If you see me chuckling to myself like Toodles from Peter Pan, I'm probably just thinking about my good friend, Elicit Tampon.

My point about baby names is no matter how crappy the name you chose for your baby is; no matter how stupid and odd it sounds; no matter how many druggie-celebrities are named the same; everyone will come to like it or not based on your baby's personality. So, in the end, as long as your baby is incredibly cute and sweet and amazing, people's opinion of that name will change to reflect that. Hooray!

As stated before, my list of name possibilities has changed over and over again. Previously on the list:

Girl Names:

Willow

Jude

Emma Grace

Lauren

Kaiya

Lindy

Boy Names:

Forrest - I don't care that there's a movie called Forrest Gump!!!!!!

A favorite game we've played with the last two pregnancies is coming up with the most "interesting" names we can think of. When Clara was still cooking we came up with a couple of winners:

Fritzi Special - after the great Spanish Fork clothing outlet

Ricey, Beefy - names Asher and Lincoln came up with

Posey - after the lady we bought the house from

This pregnancy has garnered a few additions to the list, but I would appreciate your help in coming up with better, more interesting options.

Tiara Beige - doesn't it sound awesome?

Hail Mary - I swam with a girl in high school who's name was Damaris and I could never figure out if her name was Dam-aris or Da-mare-is. The only way I finally learned was when a friend said, "It's so when her mom's mad she can just say, Damn Aris!" If we name this one Hail Mary we could just say all the time, "Aw, Hell, Mary!" and it kind of wouldn't be swearing.

Cysty - I have an ovarian cyst that's currently taking up considerable room in the womb (although, it's perfectly harmless, they tell me). We talk about it like it's the baby's twin.

Rainbow, Sunshine - Actually, if I thought I could get away with it I would name a baby Sunny or Sunshine because I knew someone really awesome and inspiring named that.

So, does anybody have any good submissions to add?

This list seems so incomplete. Please! Help!

P.S. Here's video of Clara, it's indulgent, but she's really cute.

Scrappin' it Up!

Look at me scrappin' it up! I am so sick of doing crappy scrapbook pages by hand. It takes me forever - about an hour each page - and they still look like a 13 year-old did it.
I bought a CD of scrapbook files from the craft store but then discovered CUTER, free stuff on the Internet (http://www.shabbyprincess.com/) It took me a while to figure out how to do it - what program to use, how to download (and unzip) the files, what format to save it in, etc. But now one page takes me about 15 minutes and they are slightly cuter than my handmade versions.
Hooray! I'm so glad to be saved from the tortures of real scrapbooking (I was never a REAL scrapbooker, so real scrapbookers: please do not be offended. I honor your creative expression just as I honor mimes or jazz dancers/flag twirlers (in parades) for their creative expression)
Does anyone need a tutorial? I would love to show you how it's done. And I'll take anyone's advice, tips, tricks, etc. on how to do it better. (Except from Tia, because her version of scrapbooking always includes sandpaper, which seems very wrong, and because it's has to be 2nd-gen stamping, when I never even mastered 1st-gen stamping! "Close to ma Heart!")

So, here's the first page what I done. We went on a trip to Vernal this fall because Joel had to oversee a dam. We stayed in the NASTIEST motel (the Sage Inn) on the only street in Vernal that anyone could classify as the bad part of town, but our kids kept saying, "Wow! This is the nicest hotel ever!" ...we don't get out much. We took the town by storm! - Visited the dam site for a few hours, went to Pizza Hut for dinner (DINE-IN!!!! _and_ we ordered sodas)

we went to D.I. (my favorite part of the trip, and I kept thinking the whole time how proud Dan would be to know that we went there) visited the dinosaur museum (pictured below), a city park and we spent considerable time at a wildlife refuge. It was such a fun trip, although I had to have lots of rests on account a my compromised condition (prego).


Here's our Halloween page (cute paper, for sure!) Lincoln was a pirate, Asher was a vampire, and Clara was Dorothy from the wizard of Oz. Joel and I were what we are every year, it seems, disco people/skaters/dates, or something. At our ward Halloween party we scored the prize for the cutest date (or something like that). I'm pretty sure that while they gave awards to anyone who dressed up, we came home with top honors. Also of note, I wore my rollerskates because they are lime green and white and so are my white polyester pants with green stars down the leg. I was skatin' it up like ya'll know I know how to do and someone asked me if I had ever been in a skate club, like at a roller rink. I took the question as a observant compliment to my abilities.

And here's Christmas. Lincoln and Asher both got what they asked Santa for. Lincoln got pirate dress-ups and Asher got a flashlight. But the Geo Trax which also came Christmas morning took up the bulk of our attention through the holidays.

After we opened presents Joel got out his motorcycle and pulled the kids on tubes on the fresh snow. He said it made his Christmas. It was fun family activity. Whenever I was on the tube with Clara she'd be totally silent the whole time unless I said 'woo hoo' and then she'd echo the sentiment. I kept asking her if she was having fun, and in her lowest, most bored voice she'd say, "uh-huh."

P.S. We had our ultrasound and found out we're having a girl. We're excited and happy that the baby is looking much cuter than most fetuses.

Here I Go Again

I feel so awkward with this blog, but I think I need to just post so I can get the hang of it. Here are the few pictures salvaged from our unfortunate event last month: our harddrive crashed and we lost everything. But really all we cared about was the last two years' worth of pictures and videos. Now we know we need to back-up EVERYTHING!
These next four pictures are of Clara when we went to the temple on a Sunday in September or October. I can't get over how cute she is!


These three pictures were taken in either August or September at Nielson's Grove Park in Orem. They have the best wading pools that they treat with chlorine so it's safe for little kids to splash around in. I had about thirty pictures that were so beautiful. Alas, they are gone and I can only describe to you that the lighting was magnificent, the aperture perfectly on-target, and the photographer (me) was in her best form as she snapped memory after exquisitely captured memory.

These two photos were taken by my neighbor and photographer extraordinaire Julie Magleby. Now that I know how busy she is, I can't believe she had time to spend a whole afternoon with us. She's awesome. I wish I could get to know her better. These are clear back from December 2006, but they represent the most recent photos of us.

We had the best Christmas yesterday. I loved it. We played with our toys all day and visited family and were excited to hear that Becca finally had her baby. Bless her! Joel got a laptop (ask him about it - it's sweet) and I get to go on an overnighter with NO KIDS on Friday while Megan does the dirty work for us (babysits our kids). Awesome.